My husband and I are really struggling to name our baby boy, due January 3rd. This is our first baby. Our last name is Kelly.
For a little background, I think we mostly like strong, traditional names. We have decided on the middle name of Michael, since that is both of our fathers names. I know you say that you shouldn't pick a middle name before the first, but in this case, I think it goes with most first names and frankly, middle name flow isn't that important to me - I'd rather use an honor name.
We have one name that we both love - Owen. I think that we would have decided on this name weeks ago if it weren't for one problem. My best friend is due any day now with a baby boy they are naming Rowan. I am the godmother. We don't live in the same city now and.only see them 4-6 times per year, but I talk to her almost daily and I don't know if it's too weird to have baby names that rhyme. I tried to bring it up casually, but she didn't really say anything either way.
For the time being, we have decided that Owen is our first choice and we might go with that if we don't come up with something else. Our second choice is Patrick, a name I love and my husband's grandfather's name.
Other names on my list (my husband has vetoed most): Henry, Jack, Charlie, Sam, Max, Oliver, Elliot, Everett, Milo, Finn, Bennett, Will, Mason, John (the only one my husband doesn't hate).
My husbands list: Sean, Evan, Chase. I don't like any of those.
Names we like that are out for family reasons: Aidan, Liam, Andrew
I don't know if we should just go with the name we like or if we should keep looking. Owen has been the only name we can even come close to agreeing on so far. Maybe there's something we haven't thought of?
If Rowen were the name of a friend's child, I would say go ahead and use Owen. Since Rowan is your godchild, I'd avoid Owen---although I don't think it's any kind of disaster if you go ahead and use it. I suggest Nolan instead.
Or I do love the name John tremendously, and I love it with Michael. Since your husband likes the very similar name Sean, it seems like an excellent compromise name.
I do generally suggest not choosing the middle name first, but only to make the naming process easier. Of course if there is a very important honor name and the parents are willing to make compromises in their preferences in order to use it, the suggestion does not apply in that particular situation.
Name update! K. writes:
In the end, we decided to go with Owen, since it was the one name that we both loved and agreed on. Your readers' advice was so helpful and really gave me the courage to go with the name that I loved.
We had our baby on January 8th and we couldn't be any happier with his name. Thanks so much!